Zoe B Kindergartener

Dear Zoe B,

Guess who goes to school now? REAL school? YOU. Kindergarten. What the what (this is something you say now and I think it's hilarious)?

You are in Mrs. Garey's afternoon kindergarten class at Forest View. You seem to really like it and you're making lots of new friends. We miss you in the afternoons, but you were so ready to get this school thing going. I don't blame you.

We had an amazing Michigan summer. We were gone for 6 weeks this year and it FLEW by. Too bad that as I write this (IN SEPTEMBER) it's approaching 100 degrees. Ugh. This place!

We did all of the things we love to do in Michigan. Sailboating, SUPing, tubing, lots of beach time, rides at the Cherry Festival, hanging with cousins, dog-walking with Grandma, making new summer friends, eating tons of ice cream, and swinging on the swing in Grandma's front yard. I'm so happy we're making all of these great summer memories (if you don't mind me getting all sentimental on yo ass).

Then of course you were glad to get back to KC and see your BFF Gabby and sleep in your own bed and stuff. 

You're hilariously high-intensity, kidlet. Whenever we have any kind of conflict lately and you're mad at me, you say things like, "Is this how you treat your DAUGHTER? Your CHILD?" I love it because I'm usually mad and it makes me laugh and reminds me that whatever was making me mad is probably not that big of a deal. 

I'm very proud of what a good big sister you are. You are really able appreciate Junie for who she is and you are (mostly) very patient with her. I know how hard it can be to have a little sister gettin' all up in yo biz and you're so good with her. Go you! 

I love you, my sweet growing-up-girl. A few weeks ago you got your first wiggly tooth. I almost cried. But I don't cry about that kind of stuff because I'm awesome that way. I can reign it in (or maybe I'm trying to convince myself I can). 

xoxoxoxo

Mama

Zoe says...

Mom: Why don't you go get the blue iPad out of the car?

Zoe:  Well, because I'm not .... I'm not much of a walker. Especially not in the morning.


Sheesh.

A Letter From Aunt Jess

Dear Zo, 

Well, another awesome visit with you is in the books. And let me tell you, that girls week-end in Palm Springs was one of the best ideas yet. 

You picked me up from the airport without going to starbucks first - because - you thought what if I wanted something too? How thoughtful are you my sweet?! 

You are growing like a weed - so tall and so grown-up - I can't believe how fast time flies. It's a good thing we are best friends because there is no awkwardness in not seeing each other for a while. We fall right back into our awesome routine - which is me basically doing everything you want. 

We watched Barbie princess movies and danced and sang to it in spectacular outfits on. We swam in the pool and we ordered fancy drinks while poolside - 'I will have 8 cherries please!' So. Awesome. 

You pretty much act like a teenager already, which is so funny because I thought you were only five. You were schooling me left and right - 'are you really going to wear that Aunt Jess?' Sass. Pot. The B-G force is strong with you little one. 

We slept in one bed while your mom and Junie slept in another. You were so cute snuggling up when it was time for bed. I loved it. You also ate about 600 mini-muffins from Trader Joe's that you hid under the bed from Junie. Nice one - sharing is for suckers. 

You are a great big sister though - even though you give her crap sometimes. She just adores you. Always remember that ok?

You're a really amazing observer - you pay such close attention to detail and are very perceptive of everything around you. I often wonder what you're thinking. 

You're also very into your outfits and it's just so awesome because your mom is sooooo not like that. It makes me happy you're a fashion lady, just like your Aunt Jess. 

You'll be starting kindergarten this fall, which is BANANAS, because I remember kindergarten. Clearly. Also, you were just a baby a second ago. 

I'm so excited to see you in Michigan this summer and to teach you all about mermaid dives...because on our trip you were getting better at putting your face under water. "Oh man - Mom is going to be SO proud of me." And she was. And so am I. 

Love you like ca-razy. 

Aunt Jess

And suddenly it's almost June

Dear Zoe B, 

You couldn't possibly get any cuter. Just look at this picture! Sheesh! 

Hey - 7 years ago your dad and I got married! That was a good day and I think I made an awesome decision when I decided to marry him. He's a great husband and great dad. Go me.

I have been trying to keep notes here and there of the funny things you say so that when I update this blog I'll have a long list. Here are some recent gems: 

You: "It's not easy being me."  
Me:  "Why?"
You: "Because of chores." 

(ps - you do almost NO chores ;) )

Me: "Let's brush your hair and pull it back." 
You: "No! It's not what you look like it's where you go."

"When I grow up and have my own kids I am going to name that Sam and Allie. If they are two girls I will name them Allie and Tori. And I live in your neighborhood. In Kansas City." 

Daddy: How do you spell your name? 
You: Z-O-E 
Daddy: You're pretty smart. 
You: That's because I've been me for a while now. 

We're about to take off for Michigan for 6 weeks. Well, we leave in another month. Until then you're doing swimming lessons, summer session at your preschool that you ditched and then we're in MI til school starts. CRAZY! You start kindergarten half way through August and you're doing afternoons. Originally we were going to do mornings but then we snapped out of it. Getting up at 7:30 every day? No thanks. We have one more year of sleeping in and then it's all over for us. 

You and Junie are getting along better than ever and also fighting more than ever. I guess that's just the way it is with sisters, huh?

You also now have a neighborhood friend, Matthew, and you're super excited about that but still a little shy about going to his house to ask him to play. I'm excited for you. Part of that is just me - I grew up in the country and just had Aunt Jess to play with most of the time. No neighborhood friends for me. I can tell you really like him because you act all coy and shy and half the time when he comes over you just hide from each other. I hope this isn't what's ahead for us when you're a teenager. It kind of makes me cringe. 

I love you, sweet girl. I am so lucky that you're my kid. 

xoxo
Mama

March 2013

Dear Zoe,

It's March and I love March. Spring! Birthdays! Spring! 

This is funny - we went up to Michigan for a few weeks to escape the brown Kansas winter. We wanted snow and snowpeople and sledding so we took off (right after I yanked you out of preschool, more on that later) in the van and drove to Traverse City. When we got back, the sky opened up and dumped like two feet of snow on Kansas City within a week. No joke. That's the way things work, my love. 

It's true that I yanked you out of preschool. In fact, it was Liz's idea originally. We had talked about what a racket preschool is in terms of cost and what you actually get out of it and she said she would just like to take the money and take a big road trip. A few months later we started getting into arguments about what your friends at school would think of ____ outfit, and I can't wear that kind of coat because _____ doesn't wear that kind, and so and so will laugh at me if I wear that. That was pretty much what you were taking away from preschool. Eh, no thanks. What I truly wanted you to gain from preschool was a sense that you are able to work as part of a group. I wanted you to separate from me and have your own thing that was different from our life at home. That all happened when you went to school when you were 3. So, now we're home. We're taking several trips and you're spending some good time with your little sister who is THRILLED to have you home. 

We have been going to kindergarten round-up activities - what? It's true you're starting kindergarten in 5.5 months. I'm hoping you'll go in the morning and then we'll have all afternoon to carry on with our shenanigans. We'll see. 

One totally craptastic thing that happened when we were in Michigan (craptastic is downplaying it, but I'm trying to repress it, thanks) is that you burned your precious little butt cheeks on Grandma Patty's gas fireplace glass. You got two huge (like 3 and 5 inches) 2nd degree burns on your butt. Thank God Grandma Patty was there and was able to call her pediatrician friend. Because of that, we were able to avoid the ER and spare you that trip when you were already absolutely beside yourself because of the pain. This parenting thing just tears me up sometimes. Your poor little butt - my poor little baby. That night I hardly slept - I was a balled up mess of anxiety and stress. Overall you were amazingly brave about all of it and amazingly you'll end up, I'm told, with an absolutely scar-free butt. 

You are learning how to read. You've totally got the sounding out the letters thing down. It's pretty amazing. You can read quite a few of your BOB books. Crazy. 

You're super funny, too. The other night you told me you wanted to wear your leotard all day the following day and I told you we had to run some errands. So you thought about it and then said, "I have an idea! I'll wear my leggings over my leotard and my leotard will be my shirt so I can still wear it when we go out!" So I said, "Great idea." You sighed and said, "Ah, you always love my ideas." 

I love you, my sweet girl. I am so blessed that you are my kid and always feel lucky when I go to bed at night knowing we're going to get to spend the next day together. 

Love, 

Mama

5

Dear Zoe B,

It seems like the only time I have to write on this blog is when I leave the house. Little Junebug is a rascal! Not that you're not demanding yourself but it's in your genes; you guys can't help it.

In just a few days you'll be FIVE YEARS OLD. I'm pretty sure there's some kind of rip in the fabric of time because you just can't be that old. The end.

I realized I didn't write anything about out trip to France Cancisco here, so I need to go back and get caught up there.

Jess and Michael moved to SF from Brooklyn in June and we were all super excited to be visiting her somewhere other than NYC. Don't get me wrong, New York is great. Just not so great to visit all the time with kids and you know, the fact that everything costs money there (even breathing air and peeing)  and she never had enough room for us to stay with her and everyone's mean and they act like you're in their way and out to ruin their lives. Anyway. She moved to SF and got an apartment with enough room for us to stay, and the people in France Cancisco are so laid back and hippie-ish. The guy at the hot dog cart (where they also had veggie dogs) looked right at me when it was my turn and said, "What'sss uuuupppp?" Score one for SF.

Just you, June and I went because your dad couldn't get the time off work. You guys are awesome travelers, I have to hand it to you. I was a little nervous about going it alone with two small kids but you handled it all beautifully. Yesssss.

It was a really great trip. We just did a lot of parks and hanging out and checking things out. We did some touristy things you wanted to do (trolley, sea lions, aquarium, etc) but we mostly just hung out.

The day we got there was actually the Dia de los Muertos. Jess lives in the mission district which, as we learned that day, hosts quite a crazy Dia de los Muertos street party. It was great because though you hate people in costumes when they're right in your face you are fascinated by them when you can watch from afar. We had an amazing view from Jessie's third floor apartment windows and you were just enthralled. I was also enthralled, until they wouldn't stop with the damn drumming at 1am. (Crotchety old lady!)

You were super into your Aunt Jess and when I asked you what your favorite part of the trip was you said, "Seeing Aunt Jess!". Just tears me up how cute you guys are.

We had your 5 year old birthday party the other night at our house. In attendance were: Jack, Josie, Junie, me, Daddy, Grandpa David, Grandma Jackie, Grandpa Russell, Aunt Jill, Uncle Mark, Sophie, Dominic, Michael Holloway, Liz, Ryan, Gabby, Cora, Karen, Helen, Stephanie, Alex and Alayna.

It was super fun. There was pizza and beer for the grownups and tons of cake. I MADE a piñata (probably won't ever do this again so let's get it on the record) and your dad made this punch-out party game. It was awesome.

I'm so happy to be your mom. Sometimes before you go to bed you ask to hold my hand. You say, "I want to hold your hand because you're my momma and I love you." It's so cute!

Anyway, I'm running out of time. I'm at the bookstore and a woman behind me is talking LOUD on her cell phone about the great deals she got at Wet Seal. MUST LEAVE.

I love you to bits.

xoxox
Momma

Election 2012

Dear Zoe,

THIS HAPPENED! YESSSSSSS.

I am so excited I can hardly stand it. I knew I was nervous but until today I didn't realize how nervous I actually was.

I wrote about Barack Obama in 2008 when you were just a baby - you weren't even 1 when he was elected. Now you're an awesomely feisty almost 5 year old and he's been re-elected. I'm so happy that for 8 years of your childhood he will be the President of the United States.

Sure, we're not in the best place as a country but we're in a better place than we were 4 years ago when he took office. We're making progress. Most of all, I feel so relieved that we have someone in office who believes that gay people should have the same rights as the rest of us. Someone who believes that women can make their own reproductive health decisions. Someone who believes that we all should have access to affordable health care.

And not only was Obama re-elected, we have 18 women in the Senate. We have our first openly gay woman Senator. Elizabeth Warren was elected! Claire McCaskill beat Todd Akin! It was a great night for us, Bean. Particularly for you young people. I feel good about the road we're on for your generation.

PHEEEEWWWW.

Oh and....

Zoe, 

Lately you've been asking to read the Where Did I Come From? book about how babies are made. It is KILLING me - you're so funny. 

Of course I probably wouldn't have gotten this book for you yet but you're the third kid in this house so you've inherited it early from your sibs. Fine with me - easier to talk to you about early so it doesn't become hard to talk about. 

The last time we read it you said you were just going to call breasts nipples and not breasts. "Mom - penises look like hot dogs!" During the birth part you seemed absolutely horrified that babies come out of a woman's vagina. Also - the umbilical cord grossed you out. 

Tonight you hid under the covers for the sex part and were absolutely out of your mind about the idea of eggs being inside a woman's body. Of course you were thinking chicken eggs. 

You were asking questions and wanting to see videos and we were talking for quite a while and then you refused to settle down to sleep. I said, "Zoe! You need to sleep - stop finding reasons to stay up." and you said, "MOM! Listen. I just didn't know where I came from."

I love you, Bean. 

Dear Emma or Tess or Hope or Kate

Dear Zoe,

Mostly you ask to be called Emma these days. And you ask to call me Quia. Quia, huh? Where on earth did you get that? 

We had kind of a whirlwind September. The 5 day a week peer model preschool didn't turn out to be the kind of preschool experience I was going for for you, so I pulled you out and put you back in Pioneer, which is the very sweet preschool you went to last year. You're in there with your buddy, Abby, and you're very pleased. 

We also went up to Michigan to help your Grandma Patty because she was in a Vespa crash. She fractured her pelvis in three places and broke a rib. I think our visit was mostly a very nice distraction for her but having two rascally kids in the house made things a little chaotic especially when I threw my back out. But - we got to be in Michigan in the fall, which is rare, and that was awesome. 

There are all these things that you say that make me think, "Chelsea! Get it on the blog!" Alas, I'm a procrastinator (I actually won Class Procrastinator in high school - did you know that about me?) and I forget. I remember a few things, though, so here we go:

In preschool you say a prayer before your snack and you were telling me about it one day when we were on the way to the liquor store (you love to go to the liquor store because they give you lollipops, and here in KS you can't buy wine at the grocery store so you have to make special trips - lame). You were trying to get me to say the prayer - you said, "Say this mom - 'God made the sun, God made the trees, God made the mountains, God made me'" and so I did, and then you said, "GOOD! NOW LET'S GO TO THE LIQUOR STORE!"

One of the songs I sometimes sing you and Junie at bedtime is You Can Close Your Eyes by James Taylor. The chorus goes, "So close your eyes, you can close your eyes it's all right. I don't know no love songs and I can't sing the blues anymore." It's a sweet song. The absolute best part of this, though, is that when you request this song you call it "the blues". So when you can't sleep you say, "Mom, will you sing the blues?" Best ever.

You are really excited about turning 5 in a about...6 weeks now. I really can't believe you're going to be 5 so let's just not talk about that right now.

You are growing and changing so much these days. You suddenly became very concerned about what shoes and coats you wear. We spent quite a bit of time in several shoe stores looking for the perfect shoes (you suddenly outgrew all of your shoes). At Target when you were trying on coats, you didn't like the hood on one of them so you said, 'Hmm...this one's not lookin'." And I thought it was funny so I laughed a little and this other woman nearby also laughed. The old you would have gotten upset but you would have hidden behind my leg and waited until the woman was gone to tell me you didn't like that she laughed. But the new-almost-5 you looked right at her, put your hands on your hips and said, "DON'T LAUGH AT ME!" I was pretty impressed. Of course it was slightly rude, but I was just so proud of you for being assertive. Atta girl.

In a few weeks we are going to visit your Aunt Jess in France Cancisco, as you say. I'm super excited to see what you make of it. You're so much fun to travel with - you're always up for anything and just roll with it all so well. I bet you'll be dancing on roller skates wearing a rainbow wig and hot pants in Golden Gate Park by the second day. 

Ooh - and Halloween is coming up. You and Gabby are going to be bees. Bee Princesses to be totally accurate. I can't wait.

I love you, sweet girl. I am so lucky to be your mom. 

Love, 

Mama 

Zoe B Big Kid

Dear Zoe B,

Where do I even start?

Well, this happened:

I know. You took off for preschool on the SCHOOL BUS. I was so excited for you and super proud of the way you just bounded up those steps and didn't look back. What a big girl. Sheesh. 

This year you are doing 5 afternoons a week at preschool. You go to Heartland Early Childhood Center and you're a peer model in a disabilities classroom. It's a great program and so far you seem to be really liking it. And you get to ride the bus! SCORE! Especially since you won't be able to ride the bus to elementary school since it's just right up the street.   

                           

We spent 5 weeks up in Michigan this year and you loved every minute of it. You woke up crying in the middle of the night on our last night because you didn't want to leave (but a few days after being back home you said, "I really am glad I'm home!"). You and Grandma love each other to bits and you're truly a beach kid if ever there was one. 

You made some crazy progress in the swimming department, which I did not expect. You've always been very cautious around water and don't like your face to get wet, etc. But this year it took you about a week and you just put on your life jacket and went for it. Bobbing up and down in the waves with your cousin, Zinnia, and then Gabby when she came. You even started working on putting your head under the water when you weren't wearing your life jacket. That's HUGE, dude! You worked hard and really took some risks and I'm so proud of you. 

I am so happy we get to spend this time up in Michigan for a million reasons but a big one is that it really gives you and your Grandma Patty some good time together. You just love to be together and I know you're making amazing summer memories living at her house for such a big chunk of time. It kills her that she doesn't get to see you all the time, so having you for so long in the summer is a big deal for her. 

This year Gabby, Cora, Liz and Ryan came to Michigan for a week. We had an amazing time and I think you really got a kick out of showing Gabby where we go each summer. 

I am so proud of what a big girl you're becoming. I can't believe that in just a few months you'll be 5. FIVE!?! That is a KID. Not a little kid. A kid. And just a few minutes ago you were a baby. Sometimes I look at your face and I can still see the baby you in there. It makes me melt, my sweet girl. You really will always be my baby. 

As I always tell you - I love you all the time. Every minute of every day.

Love, 

Mama